NO More Cover Bands Anymore!

Destroy All Cover Bands!
Destroy All Cover Bands!

The 2000(10)ies are devastated by a widespread musical phenomenon: cover bands. Venues where playing live music is still allowed are now colonized by an uncountable riffraff of these nostalgia marketing by-products. Such by-products are actively engaged in destroying classics and less-classics of the musical entertainment known as rock (of any sub-genre & label) by performing asphyxiated versions of tunes the closest to the original ones (they say), or with arrangements at most dictated by the shyness or the lack of an instrument. A good ol’ practice, indeed, that was discovered by jazzmen long ago – a pretty part of whom still gets along by re-frying the famous standards.

No cover band
No more cover bands!

A terminal version of cover bands is represented by tribute bands – a phenomenon where the mentally pernicious condition of fan takes part. In this case, the mechanism of asphyxiated replica is the same, except that it is applied to a single model – even if hopefully forgettable itself. Here, the disease has taken over and nothing musical (or even human) is left. How could you explain the existence of groups who spend their own energies on replicating the Genesis, the Queen, the Europe or even (I beg your pardon) Lady Gaga?

It’s time to say STOP to this photocopy-shop-like drift. It’s time to repulse the replicants in their own little lairs covered in autographed popstar posters. It’s time to play your own stuff, no matter how much horrible it might be. Wanna make a cover? Allright, take the original tune and totally turn it upside down, make another thing of it. Discs, CDs, MP3s are there right for this – not to always replicate everything.

NO more cover bands anymore! (on the refrain of No More Heroes by The Stranglers).

The Parafulmini (Lightnin’ Rods)